Attacked by a Man with a Power Saw!

Well not really, but now that I have your attention I have a tale to tell. So I was up in Northern Ontario (Canada) Last weekend filming a documentary on Pow-Wow's. We were paid to fly up there and shoot the event but were shut down due to internal politics with the tribe.

Anyway while we were there we were staying with my business partner's cousin Chalkie. Needless to say he's a bit of a wild character especially when he has WAY too much alcohol. While we were attempting to sleep for the big shoot the next day Chalkie decided to throw a party and get absolutely friggin' wasted. It started with him cranking up his stereo so loud that I could feel the bass in my internal organs.

After a while music was replaced with loud random screaming fits of gibberish. Around 4am things seemed to quiet down a bit and I finally thought I could get some sleep. I thought wrong. From out of nowhere I hear this loud cutting sound of a power saw on the bedroom door and turn to see the door fling open with Chalkie standing cutting the door. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?" I yelled. To which Chalkie replied with hysterical laughter. He then shut the door and rejoined his friends in the kitchen for more drinks. A few minutes later, I could hear some murmuring followed by hysterical laughter and a BDDDDDRRRRRAAAAAA sound of a DeWalt power saw cutting through a kitchen table. This would continue at random intervals. It was always preceded by murmurs and a loud "DON"T WORRY ABOUT IT!" followed by BDDDDDRRRRRAAAAAA of other household furniture. The center piece in the table, a speaker, the phone (while someone was on it!) the counter and bathroom door all fell victim to the power saw. I will post photos after I move into my new place. If that wasn't bad enough the sound of another power tool was soon to be heard and it was a cordless circular saw cutting the end of a computer desk off.

So around 5-5:30 in the morning things quieted up and Chalkie's company left. Finally I could get some sleep . . . or at least I thought. The silence was then cut by the song from The Silence of the Lambs. You know the scene where Buffalo Bill is dancing in the woman suit. Well the next few minutes I would like to block out of my mind as Chalkie took that time to perfectly reenact the entire scene for us completely buck-ass naked complete with "tucking". We couldn't help but both be pissed off AND laugh at this absolutely outrageous scene. After all was said and done Chalkie finally calmed down and went to sleep on the couch. FINALLY we could get some sleep. It was now about 6am and we had to get up for 9am so we weren't going to get much sleep.

The next day when we were shut down and told to stop filming, we returned to the house where Chalkie had now awakened and sobered up. "Why did you let me go so nuts last night cousin?" to which my buddy replied: "Oh I don't know, maybe it was because you had a FRIGGIN' POWER SAW IN YOUR HANDS!" He laughed and said "Yeah I guess so eh." Later on in the weekend about $4000 worth of fireworks showed up for the Pow Wow and I couldn't help but feel a sense of dread. What the hell would happen now if he gets smashed? I don't know about you but I am not a fan of getting blown up in a house, call me crazy. Needless to say all was well and I survived my ordeal. We essentially got paid to do nothing, however going through what I did I feel as though I earned it. I have to admit it was one of the more interesting experiences I have had in my life.
Wow... I remember parties like that... I was a teenager though... Sounds like a blast...


So did you get enough film for your Documentary at least???
The Paved Straight Road, Won't Always Get You Farther Than The Winding Dirt Road...


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I've seen weird crap in my life, but I've never had a drunken buddy go bonkers with a power tool.

At least it's a memorable story.

-Fred
Pirates, vampires, zombies, ninjas, ghouls, aliens, goblins, monsters, robots, sorcerers, undead, werewolves, demons, mutated dinosaur-cyborgs and those pesky phone salesmen! The shotgun is a one-size-fits-all solution!
So THIS is where the Darwin Awards come from?

-Cub. =o)
I somehow missed this topic. Very amusing read.
Travis Jacobs

"You might not sound so idiotic if there were at least something excitable in my post to begin with..." --Baf
That's...some cutting edge behaviour.